I feel like I'm walking a tightrope with no protection under me recently...ok, when Kiera is here with me all day...and I feel like, "I should be able to do this more easily!! Other people do this with more children then two for Pete's sake!"
I think I overestimate how much I am able to do on so little sleep due to the size of Cate and how "good" I feel already. But I'm still trying to get into a feeding routine with Caitlin, which I feel is like every hour during the day. Plus, she, like Kiera, enjoys to be held all the time. I'm trying hard to put her down when she falls asleep so that she can get used to not being in my arms and so I can spend more time playing with Kiera. Not easy right now.
Today I decided to venture out in the backyard with both girls for literally one hour. Number one, it's hot as hell out there!! Kiera was sweating like a faucet...although she didn't mind at all, but I had to find a shady and cool spot for Cate, which in our yard is next to impossible! So I decided to get our beach tent from the garage. Kiera and I bring Cate inside, put her in her swing and head to the garage to get it...which alone takes 10 minutes with a toddler who wants to wear certain sandals outside, her sunglasses, and a hat...that mind you she WASN'T wearing out in the backyard, but must wear out to the front of the house...and then she dawdles picking flowers on the lawn...cute, yes, must get back inside, YES! After we get inside I pop out to the deck for ONE minute to open the tent and I come back in to Kiera swinging Caitlin like a crazy person in the swing! Holy Heart Attack! Cate, however, seemed to be enjoying it and actually wasn't crying anymore. Mommy wasn't quite as happy.
We successfully got the tent up in the backyard, Cate inside, and Kiera playing all around it like a monkey...fun :) However, once Kiera got bored with this she began a new game, the "climbing up and down the deck stairs" game. If you've ever been in my backyard, it's pretty big as backyards go in New Jersey. I put the tent up in the flat part of the yard all the way at the bottom of our property, so Kiera running up and down stairs when I needed to be close to Cate as well was not easy. Finally, I'd had enough and said that we were going in to have lunch. I told Kiera that I was going to get Cate and we were going in. I turn around to get Caitlin out of the tent and Kiera flops down two of the deck stairs...Holy Heart Attack! Thank goodness she didn't fall farther or faster because the bottom is a slab of concrete. Note to self: get a gate for the bottom of the deck stairs.
I babysat for years and years and years!! The last families that I sat for had four and five children! Including babies in each family and toddlers...have I lost my touch completely?? I feel like I should be able to do this with ease, yet I'm having these issues three weeks in??!! And the whole summer lies ahead of me...holy moly.
Please think of me and send me positive thoughts...I'm nervous :)
